Lets get it clear, I don’t attend a lot of events. No weddings. No funerals. No Baptisms. No introductions. No engagements. I used to think it was a countercultural rebellion to my parents. I have come to understand it as never being any such fancy thing. I get bored easily.
Anyways, I end up attending this much talked about socialite thing called the Tokosa Food Festival. Third event happening in as many years. Having never been to one, I was obviously watching with “new eyes”. New eyes = the sense of wonder you have when you have just arrived from the village into town; also described as the realization of how the other half lives; also commonly called “Maalo” in Ugandan speak
But if you didn’t make it to this Year’s Tokosa event this is what you missed, or didn’t. See the highlight reel here.
- THE FATHERS’ COOK OFF
Obviously I was going to start with this because I participated in it. There were 4 of us. I was hopelessly under qualified and over confident. Which is why I probably was ranked last by the judges! But to be fair, they asked us to cook a kid’s breakfast and I only learnt his halfway through the 20 minutes!
Now, I grew up in the village and kids there don’t have breakfast. They just eat a left over sweet potato and a melamine cup of water and the day begins. So I knew I was in hot soup. But I knew we (me and my ego) were well and truly cooked when the eponymous Gonahasa (the one who cooks, not the talker) showed up.
20 minutes and all I could come up with was a starch heavy African child breakfast. But you should have seen me stunting! Banange! like I knew I had this in the bag. But as they say about history and victors.
2. ZUMBA DANCE WOMEN
The Zumba women who came close to the end of the event sent the crowd into a a near riot. of course Gerry Opoka who runs Beats and Steps studio was on hand to teach some moves on how all that food people had stuffed themselves with could be worked out of the system.
I don’t get Zumba but when you see those women gyrating, moving to a rhythm from deep inside you have to wonder. Is it these kind of things that give us the stereotype of a sexualized nation? I wonder because you can’t help but ask yourself, if she can do this on the dance floor what about on a 6×6 King size bed with things like school fees, saloon money, side dishes on the line? Either way, you have to see a video to know what it’s really like. Sometimes the movements are slow and almost sensual, the other times it feels like they are trying to relax an itch that cant be reached. So much fun to watch.
You just start losing weight just by watching people exercise that vigorously.
3. THE GAMES
Another highlight of the day’s activities were the games. The kids were so excited it was not even funny. they had sack racing, egg on spoon, obstacle games. There were even games for adults to play. No, not those games.
As usual, Brian Mulondo (he of the mob FOMO) shone through and tons and tons of kids walked away exhausted from a full day of food fun and music.
Although, I must say some parents looked like they brought their kids there to just stuff them with food!
4. THOSE GIRLS DOING “SWALLOW THE CHICKEN”
Of course you can’t have an event hosted by the lady queen Miss Deedan where she doesn’t play a diabolical dirty trick – purely for her own pleasure.
And that is how she tricked some respectable-looking but erstwhile hungry young ladies into trying to eat and finish a 20-piece bucket of KFC chicken. This is similar to trapping you to delicious hot food.
What you really missed was how the ladies were watching Maurice Kirya, King of Mwooyo as if he was “Kyakulya” which means he looked edible, like chicken.
5. ALL THOSE SHADES
There were just simply too many types, colours and styles of shades at this thing.
I know I will definitely come to the next Tokosa event. Even if it’s to just spend a day giving to charity which is what the event is about. Part of the proceeds went to Bless A Child foundation which is home for cancer children.
So until next time, stay cool and drink Lite!
But why am I lying…. It was a festival right? See all these smiles going down!!
For more images, visit the Kafunda Kreative Tokosa Album or go check out the #Tokosa17 hashtag on Instagram.